dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
