Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
