Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
