I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
