Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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