He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
