Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize