Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
