I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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