He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Randomize
