You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Randomize
