My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
