Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
operation have a gay friend backfired
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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