how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
