I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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