stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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