Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
then he tried to convert me to islam
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Randomize
