Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
