did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Randomize
