Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
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