There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
