you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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