so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
