i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
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