Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
You made out with two different species that night
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Randomize
