I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
