Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
