something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Randomize
