Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
Randomize
