Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
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