It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
