why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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