Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
