i can't believe i had my finger in that
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Randomize
