The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
