Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize