So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Randomize
