You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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