i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
