How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
