I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
I think your dad took our porno
you made out with another girl for some wings
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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