wanna go halves on a baby?
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Randomize
