That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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