Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
pray to the hookup gods
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