You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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