If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
We need to get me chipped asap
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Randomize