Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
