How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
