i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
