roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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