bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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